I’ve been feeling stuck for a while now, like I’m caught in some kind of loop.
There’s this constant pressure inside of me—this voice that keeps telling me I need to do something big, something meaningful. I feel it every day. And yet… I don’t do it. I keep making these big plans, dreaming of the perfect moment to start, thinking that one day it’ll all just click.
But it never does. And I’m tired of it.
I lost something huge a while back. VR Marvelites—my baby, the project that was going to take me to the next level. It all crashed and burned after Google shut down my account. I was left feeling drained, defeated, and lost in a sea of questions I didn’t have answers to.
For months, I tried to pick myself back up. Then I started building my personal brand, something that I always wanted to do. But the constant pressure of earning and growing slowly started reaching my head.
Then I read the quote that I had written earlier when I started my journey:
“Passion needs Freedom and Money is the medium to BUY that Freedom”… That quote stuck me. It stuck right in my heart.
I finally accepted that I was just grinding and I was making videos just for the hell of it. I won’t lie, every minute of my life I spent on it was worth it but I was not feeling the ‘kick’ I needed.
I realized I had to learn more. I have to experiment more. And I can’t just make and upload videos that in the first place I don’t want to see…
So with that realization came the pressure—the kind of pressure that eats away at you every single day. The kind that makes you feel like you’re not enough, like you’re wasting time. After nine months of this suffocating feeling, I finally caved.
I applied for jobs, and eventually, I got one in the first interview. It gave me stability—financial stability. I could breathe again. I wasn’t drowning in stress anymore, and for a moment, it felt like I was getting my life back.
I started buying clothes, going to cafes, exploring cities, making spontaneous plans; doing whatever my heart wanted to do. For the first time in 9 months, I was free. I could sleep without thinking (and worrying) about tomorrow.
But now, I’m back in the loop. I wake up with that same feeling again, the one that tells me I’m not doing what I’m supposed to be doing. Sure, I’ve got money coming in, but what’s the point of security if I feel like I’m slowly losing myself? I feel… lazy. Lethargic. And there’s this constant voice telling me to act—but for me this time, not for my business and career.
I know what I need to do. I’ve always known. But I keep putting it off. I keep waiting for that perfect moment that never comes. I overcomplicate everything, making plans within plans, but never actually starting. It’s almost like I’m afraid of what happens once I do.
It’s me. I’m the one holding myself back. No one else. Just me.
This Is What I Need To DO!
So here’s what I’m telling myself now: Stop waiting. Stop planning. Stop procrastinating. Just start.
I need to stop overthinking and take immediate action on one small thing, right now. Not tomorrow, not next week, but right now. The perfect moment doesn’t exist, and the longer I wait, the more I convince myself that it does.
Starting small might seem insignificant, but it’s the only way to break this loop. It’s the only way I’ll feel the change I’m so desperate for. I don’t need to build Rome in a day. I just need to lay one brick.
And that’s what I’m going to do.
I don’t care if it’s messy. I don’t care if it’s imperfect. I need to feel the shift. One step forward is better than none. Action creates momentum, and momentum creates change.
I’ve spent enough time in this loop. Now, it’s time to move.
This post is my first step and If you’re reading this and you feel the same way, then maybe this is your sign too. Stop waiting for the perfect moment. Start now—however small the step may be. Because trust me, you’ll never be ready. You just have to do it.
It’s time to get out of my own way.
– Dewansh Jain; 1:00pm 12th October 2024
